Transformational Twenties
friendship edition
As I am approaching the end of my 20’s I have been experiencing a shift in my lifestyle. During my teens and early twenties, I think most would agree that I was a social butterfly. I had a busy calendar filled with happy hours, events, parties, travels, dating, etc. I often prioritized more of my time to my social life than spending time with my family or just alone – But once I turned 25, I began to deeply feel the shift. I began to crave time alone. I began to prefer to spend time with my family over my friends. I began to know what I truly value in a partner. I began to realize I was becoming the woman I want to be. My definition of “fun” changed. My priorities changed. As this shift became clearer and clearer, I found myself feeling disconnected from those in my social circle. Those in my social circle were people I would confide in, laugh with, share with, yet I no longer felt connected with – honestly, it was sad. There were also friends that I just wasn’t able to see as often as before and that created a natural distance (even pre-pandemic). Simultaneously, I began to want to connect with old friends that I had lost touch with but that didn’t work out as I had wished. Nonetheless, I began to feel lonely. As time went by, I discovered that while I am growing and maturing, there is this major phase of re-evaluating and releasing. I began to let go of the party girls, the judgey ones, the flakey ones, the selfish ones, and not because I think I am better than them but because that is simply no longer who I connect with. I want to surround myself with those of similar values and lifestyles. Those who you can have meaningful conversations with, those who will support your accomplishments, those you can learn from, those who honor their bodies, those who are empathetic. I guess what I am trying to say is that the reality is you will lose friends who you don't have anything against, you just don't have anything in common anymore. Sometimes you lose friends because you realize they never treated you right. Sometimes we have to weed out the toxic ones and hold onto the people who are actually there for us. As we become more of who we really are, we begin to see the world a bit different, sometimes totally different… and well that’s more than ok. Through this all, I am lucky to have such a tight-knit family and partner that I can always turn to – for guidance, for company, for laughs, and mostly for a lot of love. Special thanks to Mom, Dad, and Shoshi – You are my people.
